This was my first retreat, at the Sisters of Immaculate Heart. Oddly enough, I went to Immaculate Heart highschool, after the nuns split. This place was amazing, a castle from the 20's, donated to the sisters by the last owner, many, many years ago. Diana Sawyer's interview with Mel Gibson was filmed there.

Sister Donna gave us a lot to think about. We talked about the highs in our lives and the lows. I really like Sister Donna, she's a great teacher. She had us pick out a shell at the very beginning of the day, and carry it around with us, and then, at the end of the day, asked us to say why we had picked that particular shell. I said my shell had picked me. I put my shell on the top of my computer so I can look at it every day.

This was my first time at confession. Confession made me cry, too. I am not going to share what was said in confession.

When I got home, I had a cigarette on the balcony. It was the last in my pack. It was sprinkling, I didn't feel like going to 711 to get more.

There is one part of my confession I will share. Father said I should do something good for a child. I thought about it, and I decided the best thing I could do for my child was to stop smoking. I asked God's help to stop smoking. So far, no cravings, which is amazing.

It's my birthday. I'm 47 years old today. Tonight was also one of the nights that I go for RCIA.

My birthday was depressing, nothing was happening. At 6:45 I left to go to Holy Family for RCIA. On the way there, I passed the Armory, and there were hundreds of people quequed up for homeless meals. There but for the grace of God go I, I was thinking as I passed by. I didn't feel as depressed anymore.

Father Harrigan gave the talk tonight. He is a truly amazing man, almost frightening in his forceful faith in God and the Catholic church.

When it was over, I started walking home, and I said to God, "Thank you, that's a pretty good birthday after all." Well, I felt as if someone had hit me with a Happy Stick. I was so full of joy all the way home that I felt I was walking on air. I know this was God's birthday present to me.